John: Forgive me Father, I have sinned. I stole some wood from a construction site.
The priest: Well what did you do with the lumber, my son?
John: Well my son's wheelchair ramp was broken so I fixed it.
The priest: At least you did a good deed with it.
John: Wait father, I had some wood left.
The priest: What did you do with it?
John: My dog was cold so I built him a house.
The priest: I guess you still did good with it.
John: Wait father, I had some wood left.
The priest: What did you do with it?
John: My car was cold, so I built it a two-car garage to keep it warm.
The priest: That seems a little out of hand...
John: But father, I still had a little wood left. My wife had always wanted a bigger house, so I built a second floor for our house.
The priest: Whoa! That's way-y-y too much! You're going to have to make a Novena for penance. Do you know how to make a Novena, my son?
John: No father, but if you have the plans I have plenty of wood.
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