Thursday, November 30, 2017
THROWBACK THURSDAY - "For the sake of time... punchlines only"
(originally published on June 18, 2009)
For the sake of time... punchlines only
Rectum? Damn killed him!
I rang the doorbell, didn't I?
This time you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on its head.
Aren’t you a little bit old to be believin’ in Leprechauns then?
We're the Aristocrats!
That dog's not so shaggy
Doctor: “Okay, you’re ugly too”.
Frayed knot
Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.
They chip their teeth.
There’s WhiteOut on the screen
Watching your mother-in-law drive your brand new car off a cliff
But Mabel – it’s eating POPCORN!
Not so tough now are you, Batman!!
Well, wash your hands. I want a grilled cheese sandwich.
Wednesday, November 29, 2017
Website Wednesday 17.47
Website
Wednesday
a subsidiary of Skip's House of Chaos
(The 234,453rd Most Interesting Man in the World)
"From the Large Intestine of the Internets,
through the Sphincter of Electronic Mail,
peeing like a baby on a changing table
into the brisk digital wind..."
a subsidiary of Skip's House of Chaos
(The 234,453rd Most Interesting Man in the World)
"From the Large Intestine of the Internets,
through the Sphincter of Electronic Mail,
peeing like a baby on a changing table
into the brisk digital wind..."
When one door closes,
another opens.
When one door closes,
another opens.
When one door closes,
another opens.
-
Me, eating
through a
chocolate
advent
calendar
Top of the heap: The Top Health Benefits of Coffee
Christian Theologians Challenge the Corruption of U.S. Christianity
Looking for stuff to binge watch? Here y'go...
21 Things That Will Make You Miss the Heck Out of Elementary School
Netflix's New Releases Coming in December, 2017
The Full 2017 Schedule of Christmas Movies and TV Specials
Here's a Path to Medicare for (Almost) All That Isn't Doomed to Fail
The Longest Songs of Classic Rock (Thanks, Melody!)
Here are 7 Airports More Interesting Than the One You're Stuck In
A Day in Pompeii - animation
The Amazing Benefits of Sleeping Naked
12 Secrets of FedEx Delivery Drivers
How to win at Monopoly
All you need to know about battery life hacks
8 Surprising Things You May Be Doing While Asleep
13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married
10 Heartwarming Facts About The Miracle on 34th Street
The Little Drummer Boy Challenge - THE ultimate test of your Christmas music avoidance skills
Love you, mean it. Let's do lunch. Have your people call my people. Ciao, bella.
- Skip ಠ_à²
Website Wednesday archives
(If you'd like to subscribe to the Website Wednesday mailing list,
shoot
me an email and let me know)
This e-mail, the files transmitted with it, and the sender of this email are the property of Skip's House of Chaos and/or its affiliates. This email is confidential, and is intended solely for use of the individual or entity to whom this email is addressed. If you are not one of the named recipient(s) or otherwise have reason to believe that you have received this message in error, please notify the sender, delete this message from your computer, destroy your computer immediately, forget all that you have seen and turn yourself over to the proper authorities. Any other use, retention, observation, dissemination, consideration, recollection, forwarding ridicule, printing, viewing, copying, or unauthorized memorization of this e-mail without the express written consent of Major League Baseball is strictly prohibited. The contents of this e-mail are not intended to be taken literally. Void where prohibited by law or common sense. Not valid in Rhode Island, Guam and the Xinhua province in China. Condiments available upon request. A transcript of this e-mail is available free of charge. Cash value = 1/20 of once cent. All rights reserved. © 2017.
Tuesday, November 28, 2017
One day, in the hospital...
A man is lying in bed in a hospital
with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his hands
and feet.
"Nurse," he mumbles from
behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse
replies, "I don't know, I'm only here to wash your hands and feet".
He struggles again to ask,
"Nurse, are my testicles black?"
Finally, she pulls back the covers,
raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in her other
hand and takes a close look, and says "There is nothing wrong with
them!"
Finally, the man pulls off his
oxygen mask and replies, "That was very nice but, are... my... test...
results... back?”
TUNESMITH TUESDAY - "Bad to the Bone" by George Thorogood And The Destroyers
Bad To The Bone
On the day I was born
The nurses all gathered 'round
And they gazed in wide wonder
At the joy they had found
The head nurse spoke up
And she said leave this one alone
She could tell right away
That I was bad to the bone
Bad to the bone
Bad to the bone
B-B-B-B-Bad
B-B-B-B-Bad
B-B-B-B-Bad
Bad to the bone
I broke a thousand hearts
Before I met you
I'll break a thousand more, baby
Before I am through
I wanna be yours pretty baby
Yours and yours alone
I'm here to tell ya honey
That I'm bad to the bone
Bad to the bone
B-B-B-Bad
B-B-B-Bad
B-B-B-Bad
Bad to the bone
I make a rich woman beg
I'll make a good woman steal
I'll make an old woman blush
And make a young girl squeal
I wanna be yours pretty baby
Yours and yours alone
I'm here to tell ya honey
That I'm bad to the bone
B-B-B-B-Bad
B-B-B-B-Bad
B-B-B-B-Bad
Bad to the bone
Monday, November 27, 2017
MONDAY MIND GAME
Can you find the missing number in the sequence given below?
11 15 19 12 16 ? 13 17 21 14 18 22
Give up?
Drag your cursor between the asterisks for the answer
*
The sequence is given in the puzzle is:
11 15 19 12 16 ? 13 17 21 14 18 22
Let's break the given series as below:
11 15 19
12 16 ?
13 17 21
14 18 22
Now read the number from the left-hand side from top to bottom.
So the number that will replace "?" is 20
*
