THROWBACK THURSDAY - "Zee vs. Zed: Why We're Right and the Rest of the English-Speaking World is WRONG"

(originally published on June 12, 2011)

Zee vs. Zed:

Why We're Right
and the Rest of the English-Speaking World is WRONG

I used to live in England.  Lovely country, wonderful people, lousy weather. 

When speaking with someone I'd just met, the conversation would often go in the following direction:

"Oh, you're an American!  I love your accent!"

"Are you kidding?  I'm the only person on this Island who doesn't HAVE an accent!"

(Polite laughter) "Oh, you Americans are so funny. Remember, we invented the language."

"Yeah, you invented it, but we perfected it."

At which point the discussion would pretty much devolve into a debate regarding the relative merits of our respective languages.

The British (and Canada, and Australia, and New Zealand, and pretty much all the rest of the English-speaking societies) have some different terminologies for common words.

            What We Call           They Call

             Pants                        Trousers

             Car Trunk                  Boot

             Sweater                    Jumper

             Pencil eraser             Rubber (you can have fun with that)

             Dessert                     Pudding

             Cookie                      Biscuit

             Soccer                      Football (okay, I'll give them that one)

…and a bunch of others.  The one, though, that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever is that they refer to the last letter of the alphabet as “Zed.”  That’s flat out wrong.  It’s preposterous.  And I can prove it.

It’s because of The Song.  The Alphabet Song.

We all know it.  We learned our ABC’s because of it.  Our parents and teachers taught us and we pass it on to our kids.

To refresh your memory, the song goes:

“ABCDEF – Gee

HIJKLMNO – Pee

QRS, TU – Vee

W, X, Y and… “

Now WHAT rhymes with “Vee?”  Hmmm, let’s think.  A word, beginning with the last letter of the alphabet which rhymes with “Vee.” 

Here’s a hint:  It ain’t “Zed.” 

Try it.  Sing it with “Zed” as the last word.

“ABCDEF – Gee

HIJKLMNO – Pee

QRS, TU – Vee

W, X, Y and… zed.”

It sounds like you’re running into a wall.

Game over, you lose.  We kicked your ass in 1776, and we’re doing again today.

America – 1

England (and the REST of the English-Speaking World) – NIL!

Spot the Brit