Why are Harry Potter’s best friend and his cooking pot alike?
They’re both cauldron.
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I wonder if disease researchers get nervous whenever one of their coworkers calls in sick?
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My life doesn’t revolve around sex. Sex’s immense gravitational field long ago sucked my life into its event horizon and shredded it into elementary particles.
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The gender-neutral term for Sugar Daddy is Glucose Guardian
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Wait… do Flat-Earthers think all the planets are flat, or just the Earth?
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Studies show that there are 6 distinct types of people in the world:
People who only care about themselves and 5 other types of people
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Going to an antique store won’t make you gay, but it will make you buy curios.
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I decided to reward myself with a well-earned cup of coffee after a long hard week.
Then I realized that it’s Tuesday. Morning.
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Apple Store employee: “Do you want to go with the 32GB or the 128GB option?”
Me: “Okay, so like how many memes is that?”
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Two wrongs don’t make a right, but three rights make a left.
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