SHOC

SHOC
Discerning content for Bad Hombres and Nasty Women

Friday, March 31, 2017

Each dot is moving in a straight line...





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The Bunny Rabbit and Pancakes

A bunny rabbit wakes up one Sunday morning with an extreme craving to eat pancakes. This desire cannot wait and the forest diner is closed on Sundays, so he decides to hop all the way to the grocery store (which is about 25 minutes away). He gets there and buys everything he needs: cooking oil, pancake batter, four types of jam, Canadian maple syrup, butter, the works. As soon as he gets home though, he realizes he had forgotten that his frying pan was very old and ended up getting completely ruined last time he used it, and thinks to himself:

"Damn it! I really don't want to hop all that way and back again, it's almost an hour. Wait! the bear lives only five minutes away, he eats tons of food, and I know he has a bunch of frying pans, surely he won't mind lending me one!"

So he heads out to the bear's place. On the way, he starts thinking:

"You know, maybe the bear will want some of the pancakes since he's lending me a frying pan. Well, I guess that's fair, I mean, I couldn't make the pancakes without his frying pan. Out of the 15 pancakes I can make with the stuff I bought, I guess I can give him 5. Yeah, 10 will be more than enough for me.

"Hmm... well, the bear is much bigger than me, so what if he wants more than 5 pancakes? Well... I don't know, I guess that's all right. I don't usually eat much and I'll probably be fine if I eat just a few... So if he wants 10, well, 5 should be enough for me! I really only have this craving, and if I eat only a couple, it will probably go away (as they say, a lot more exciting at first...)

"Hmm... well... what if he wants more than 10? I mean, he's much bigger than me, it's not like I can do anything if he decides to just have them. If he says he wants to help out because he wants to eat some too, I can't really say no, after all, he is lending me a frying pan. But then he can come back with me and while we make them, he could just eat pancake after pancake and I can be left with nothing! I mean, what's the big deal, why can't he just lend me a damn frying pan for 20 damn minutes, he's got tons of them?? I always try to help him out if he asks for something, why can't he do the same?!"

Just about this time he gets to the bear's place. Knocks on the door, bear opens.


"You know what, bear? Fuck you, and fuck your frying pan!"

What did you expect?


Is there a Doctor in the house?




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You must have kids...




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Thursday, March 30, 2017

The Untold Story of the Pixar Lamp




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Well, now that our government rolled on us... what's a VPN and why should you use one

Disclaimer

I ain't no Computer Rocket Doctor Surgeon, but I've used a VPN for various reasons, including banking and most purchases. I haven't used TOR because I don't fully understand it. So if any of you Internet wizards have anything to add, please leave a comment or email me. I'm fairly green in the VPN world, and I'd love to learn more.



So. What's a VPN?

Well Jimmy, its a virtual private network. Virtual Private Networks (VPN) allows you to connect to the Internet via a server run by a VPN provider. All data traveling between your computer, phone or tablet, and this “VPN server” is securely encrypted.



How it works

Well Jimmy, normally, when you connect to the Internet, you first connect to your Internet Service Provider (ISP), which then connects you to any websites (or other internet resources) that you wish to visit. All your internet traffic passes through your ISP’s servers, and can be viewed by your ISP.

When using VPN you connect to a server run by your VPN provider (a “VPN server”) via an encrypted connection (sometimes referred to as a “VPN tunnel”). This means that all data traveling between your computer and the VPN server is encrypted so that only you and the VPN server can “see” it.



Pros

Provide privacy by hiding your Internet activity from your ISP (and government)

Allow you to evade censorship (by school, work, your ISP, or government)

Allow you to “geo-spoof” your location in order to access services unfairly denied to you based on your geographical location (or when you are on vacation)

Protect you against hackers when using a public WiFi hotspot

Allow you to P2P download in safety.



Cons

It costs money (usually around $5-10 monthly with a one-year subscription)

You are basically shifting trust from your ISP to the VPN server (EFF logos are a plus)

And it can crap out and slow you down at times.



Resources

Bestvpn.com has tons of info and all my info is pulled directly from their beginners guide to VPNS
(Wikipedia.org/wiki/virtual_private_network)

Pcmag also has some very good articles on VPNS.



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THROWBACK THURSDAY - "Embrace Insanity"

(originally posted on February 13, 2011)


(Wait. Shouldn't that be the other way around?)



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This... Changes... Everything!



To quote my buddy Tim (who came up with this gem), 


"Be still my beating heart. And if I ate this, it probably would."

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Or, conversely, it would make The Walking Dead a one-season show...


Website Wednesday 17.13

Website Wednesday
a subsidiary of Skip's House of Chaos
(The 234,453rd Most Interesting Man in the World)
 

"From the Large Intestine of the Internets,

through the Sphincter of Electronic Mail,
peeing like a baby on a changing table
into the brisk digital wind..."  

                    We’ve all heard that those little plastic-ringy-things on
                    six-packs of soda and beer cans can be dangerous for
                    waterfowl, and I’m totally on board with finding some sort
                    of viable, eco-friendly alternative. In the meantime, does
                    anyone know how much I can get for a six-pack of ducks?


Top of the heap:  17 Little One-Minute Hacks That'll Improve Your Life Instantly

Skipping chemo for an End-Of-Life road trip

Dropbox vs. Google Drive vs. OneDrive: Which Cloud Storage Is Best for You?

Pinterest Kitchen Hacks – What Works and What Doesn’t

14 terrifying tourist attractions that will make your stomach drop (Thanks, Melody!)

How to decide which apps to delete from your phone

Literally 100 Really Funny Game Of Thrones Jokes, Memes, and Puns (but you have to know the show to get the jokes)

A look into the most famously odd Spite Houses

Here are the ages you peak at everything

30 passionate but pointless arguments

This $5900 office chair is supposed to counteract the ill effects of sitting at work

Neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you stress-free (or at least reduce it)

This years clunkers - 10 of the Lowest-Rated Cars for 2017

How Disney Saved Musicals for a New Generation

The Haunting Face of a Man Who Lived 700 Years Ago

Considering sneaking into North Korea? Here are 10 Things You Should Know (other than, "don't do it")

The Soul-Sucking, Attention-Eating Black Hole of the Trump Presidency

Your Complete DC Comics Superhero Movie Release Calendar

The 50 Tools Everyone Should Own



Love you, mean it. Let's do lunch. Have your people call my people. Ciao, bella.
 
- Skip
   _ಠ


 Website Wednesday archives


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I like my coffee a little on the Dark Side


Star Trek: Discovery

Star Trek: Discovery is coming sometime in 2017. It was originally set to be released in January and then May of this year, so now we're just waiting to see when it comes out (the current thinking is sometime in May).
When it does debut, it will initially be on CBS, but then move to CBS All Access, an over-the-top subscription streaming video-on-demand service.
Here's where the new series will fit into the rest of the Star Trek universe:


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Tuesday, March 28, 2017

TWEETS OF THE WEEK




'MURICA! - absoLUTEly...


TUNESMITH TUESDAY - Deadpool Musical - Beauty and the Beast "Gaston" Parody

Our hapless hero, Deadpool, enters a bar looking for a little trouble (what else?) – and then the musical mayhem begins. From the beautiful baroque intro of the bartender (Mack Dugger), Deadpool fights off a bevy of mercenaries all hoping to kill our hero and win the dead pool. Luckily, Black Widow (Monette Moio), Rogue (Jennifer Wenger), and Psylocke (Christina Benthall) happen to be in the bar, but less than willing to help our mutated mouthy hero. Thank goodness Spider-Man (Christopher Troy) literally drops in to lend a hand before the final battle involving everyone in the bar. 

Who knew the “Merc with a Mouth” could sing? 


NSFW Language! 

Also, be sure to stay past the credits for a little something “X-tra!”


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