Krispy Kreme is to donuts what freebasing is to cocaine.
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I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.
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me: *puts earphones in*
me:
me:
me:
me:
me:
me:
me:
me:
me:
me: oh right
me: *plays music*
~~~~~
So apparently someone spray-painted a swastika on Donald Trump’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. The pisser is that there’s no way to know if it was done by someone who hates him or supports him.
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You know, I’ve been thinking. Trump’s plan to have Mexico pay for the wall just might actually work. If for no other reason that, if he’s elected President, the Mexicans will get fed up with us illegally immigrating to their country…
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No matter who wins the election in November, it’ll be historic. We’ll either have:
…the first female President,
…the first Jewish President,
…the first Canadian President, or
…the last President
(Donito Trumpolini, anyone?)
~~~~~
Here’s something… archeologists digging in a pyramid in Egypt have found a mummy covered in chocolate and hazelnuts, and believe it to be Pharaoh Rocher.
I’ll show myself out.
~~~~~
My idea of cardio is squatting down to see what’s in the fridge
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Have you seen this? Did you hear about this? The new Taco Bell commercial has people dancing, doing back flips, and spinning on their heads after eating. Which is, by my reckoning, quite a stretch from reality where you sit on a toilet and ask God why He has forsaken you.
~~~~~
I haven’t eaten an apple in days.
The doctors are closing in.
My barricade won’t last much longer.
They’re coming.
Tell my family I love th-
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