Discerning content for Bad Hombres and Nasty Women

Saturday, April 30, 2016

Such a beautiful sediment...

(Thanks, Trevor!)

Naming Conundrum

Jane and John were childhood sweethearts who grew up and eventually married.

Time passed and they had a beautiful baby girl, but there was only one problem. They couldn’t decide on a name for their newborn baby girl. They’d narrowed it down: John liked Cohen, and Jane liked Carmen, but they couldn’t break the deadlock.

Being so in love Jane and John decided not to argue but to give the little girl both names, and people could call her whichever they liked best. John called her Cohen and Jane called her Carmen.

Unfortunately, by the time she was 18, the poor girl didn’t know if she was Carmen or Cohen.


Creative Bathroom Signs

(More here)

Friday, April 29, 2016

What rhymes with "Friday"?

(Thanks, Danielle W!)

Consider, if you will...

Consider, if you will, 
the case of the awkward bumblebee who became ill 
while gathering pollen but continued to work.
 Unfortunately, he thus infected all the flowers with his virus. 
The consequences are recorded in the annals of horticulture as 

. . . the blight of the fumble bee.


Mad Scientists

Friday Factoids


Thursday, April 28, 2016

Definitely Science

You know you're addicted to scuba diving when...

1.You flunked high school physics but you amazingly can calculate the partial pressure of a gas in equilibrium and its solubility and absorption rate by the body during a dive using Henry’s Law!

2. Every morning the sound of shaving foam (psshhhht) makes you want to go diving.

3. You’re the only one of your office buddies that doesn’t snicker when the word “off-gassing” is mentioned.

4. You get out of bed in the morning by doing a back-roll.

5.You’ve never watched Star Wars but you’ll watch “The Abyss”, “Men Of Honor” or “Deep Blue Sea” 100 times.

6. Then you finally start watching the Star Wars movies and think to yourself “Man, Darth Vader really needs to get that regulator replaced!”  

7. You show up at your neighborhood swimming pool during the off-season in full dive gear hoping to log some bottom time.

8. You’re the only one who isn’t blushing when you ask your friends, “Want to see some Nudi pictures?

9. You have more ‘C’ cards than credit cards in your wallet.

10. You’re more worried about your divers' insurance payments than your health insurance.

11. Your preferred method of getting high is to get narked on a deep dive.

12. When your kid’s first words are PA-DI instead of Dad-dy.

13. You see a perfectly good ship and think. “Boy, that would sure make a nice wreck to dive in!”

14. You spend most of your time picking apart the unrealities in the latest Hollywood diving flick rather than watching the movie.

15. You automatically equalize your ears by performing the Valsalva maneuver every time you step into an elevator.

16. You answer “Suunto” when asked what kind of computer you use.

17. You spit on your car windshield to prevent it from fogging up.

18. You can’t afford a wristwatch because you spent all your money on an expensive dive computer instead. 

19. While others long for Rolex, Omega or Tag Heuer on their wrists you’d settle for a Mares, Suunto  or Oceanic.

20. When you think your neighbors’ vacation to Belize was a waste of money because they didn’t do any diving.

21. When getting a “reverse squeeze” has nothing to do with your girlfriend grabbing your butt!

22. You can’t remember your wedding anniversary but always know when Discovery Channels “Shark Week” is on.

23. You get excited about the viz while you go swimming in a pool.

24. The only suit in your closet besides your wedding suit…is your wetsuit

25. And you need serious help… if your wedding suit IS your wetsuit.


Sign Language - How to Finger Spell in one easy lesson


Okay class, pay attention...


Here we go...

Okay, got it?

In this week's "You-Know-It's-Going-To-Be-A Bad-Day-When" department...

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Giving the Boston Dynamics robot a voice...

Website Wednesday 16.17

Website Wednesday
a subsidiary of Skip's House of Chaos
(The 234,453rd Most Interesting Man in the World)

"From the Large Intestine of the Internets,

through the Sphincter of Electronic Mail,
peeing like a baby on a changing table
into the brisk digital wind..."  

                    Say what you want about Kanye and Kim naming
                    their daughter North West, but there’s no denying
                    that this little girl is going straight to the top…

                    …and slightly to the left.

Top of the heap:  12 Body Hacks To Make Your Life Easier

23 Strange Movie Facts You Probably Didn’t Know Until Now

The Perfect House For Surviving A Zombie Apocalypse Is For Sale

10 Hidden Talents of the Octopus

93 Percent Of The Great Barrier Reef Is Practically Dead (Overfishing, pollution, and climate change are the culprits)

The Bard’s Ballot: 2016 Candidates as Shakespeare Characters

The Most Brutally Difficult Video Games Ever

How to identify any language at a glance

Inside Laredo, the Secret, Members-Only Wild West Town in England

Explore Westeros and Essos with this incredible 360-degree Game of Thrones map

Behind the scenes pics from Batman in the 1960s

Passengers You DO NOT Want Near You

11 Airline Secrets From an Airline Insider

Love you, mean it. Let's do lunch. Have your people call my people. Ciao, bella.
- Skip

 Website Wednesday archives

(If you'd like to subscribe to the Website Wednesday mailing list,
shoot me an email and let me know)

So THAT'S what they're doing...

Do you know why I pulled you over?


Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Grandpa Cruz

Okay, this is funny.

And a little terrifying.

True Facts

1. Mammoths were alive when the Great Pyramid was being built.

2. Betty White is older than sliced bread.

3. From the time it was discovered to the time it was stripped of its status as a planet, Pluto hadn't made a full trip around the Sun.

4. The lighter was invented before the match.

5. Anne Frank and Martin Luther King Jr. were born in the same year.

6. France last used a guillotine to execute someone after Star Wars premiered.

7. Harvard University was founded before Calculus existed.

8. If you have 23 people in a room, there is a 50% chance that 2 of them have the same birthday.

9. It’s never said that Humpty Dumpty was an egg in the nursery rhyme.

10. The water in Lake Superior could cover all of North and South America in a foot of water.

11. North Korea and Finland both border the same country; Russia.

12. When you get a kidney transplant, they usually just leave your original kidneys in your body and put the 3rd kidney in your pelvis.

13. Oxford University is older than the Aztec Empire.

14. National animal of Scotland is a Unicorn.

15. The Ottoman Empire still existed the last time the Chicago Cubs won the World Series.

16. The lighter the roast of coffee, the more caffeine it has.

17. A speck of dust is halfway in size between a subatomic particle and the Earth.

18. If the timeline of earth was compressed into one year, humans wouldn't show up until December 31 at 11:58 p.m.

19. If you were able to dig a hole to the center of the earth, and drop something down it, it would take 42 minutes for the object to get there.

20. We went to the moon before we thought to put wheels on suitcases.

21. A human could swim through the arteries of a blue whale.

22. If you could fold a piece of paper in half 42 times, the combined thickness would reach the moon.

23. On both Saturn and Jupiter, it rains diamonds.

24. Saudi Arabia imports camels from Australia.

25. You can line up all 8 planets in our solar system directly next to each other and it would fit in the space between Earth and the Moon.

26. The youngest known mother was 5 years old.

27. The Earth is smoother than a billiard ball, if both were of the same size.

28. Nintendo was founded in 1889.

29. If you take all the molecules in a teaspoon of water and lined them up end to end in a single file line, they would stretch ~30 billion miles.

30. In Australia, there was a war called the emu war. The emus won.