SHOC

SHOC
Discerning content for Bad Hombres and Nasty Women

Saturday, February 29, 2020

Breakup Translation Guide




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Lessons From Inigo Montoya




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Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na BATDOG!





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Commitment




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Well, I will from now on, anyway




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Are You a Lover of Books?


Leap Day Puns, Jokes, and One-Liners

Why was the anti-vaxxer’s 3-year old crying?
They were having a mid-life crisis.

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I sincerely hope that when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears, people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that.

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EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING.

Me: Wow, that was an amazing dream!
Brain (10 seconds later): What dream?

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Mark my words.
(Mark brings me my dictionary)
Thank you, Mark.

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If there’s one thing adulthood has taught me it’s that you don’t really need fun to have alcohol.

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Since it’s impossible for me to know which part of my life is the middle, I’ve decided to have an ongoing crisis

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If the NSA needs to listen to all our communications in order to locate the people actually *making* the fruitcakes, I’m okay with that.

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Sir Mix-A-Lot likes big butts and cannot lie.
His twin brother does not like big butts and cannot tell the truth.
You may ask one question.

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I saw a bird eating a piece of avocado toast
I’m thinkin’ it was a millennial falcon.

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When I die, I want all my friends to come to my funeral and give wildly conflicting accounts of my life.


Somebody doesn't have a sense of humor...




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Productivity




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This week's Moment of Zen


Can't be too careful these days





(Thanks, Lucky!)

Happy Leap Day, Little Ducks!


Dumb Joke of the Day That Actually Made Me Laugh





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Adult Happiness




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Meanwhile, in Switzerland...


Friday, February 28, 2020

Quick math

I kinda feel for the guy, actually...

You just never really know...


What's that smell...?





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Tom & Jerry




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Handy Husband Hint


Racist Sharpener




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Pick-up Line Factor 10




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This.


FACTOID FRIDAY


Modern Problems Require Modern Solutions, Part Deux





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Rasslin'




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Modern Problems Require Modern Solutions





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Federal Government Employment Application





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Thursday, February 27, 2020

Celebrities Impersonating Other Celebrities

The THX Deep Note




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Yeah, I'm still on the second step...


Wedding Tip


Illuminati Secret #45386





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Inspirational



(Thanks, Doug!)

Forget bandaids or "Tis but a scratch" stickers...

THIS is what you use when
you have a dent in your car

THROWBACK THURSDAY - "Scrabble in Germany"

(Originally published on November 24, 2014)




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A very thin line, indeed




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Smooooooth


The Life Cycle of Coffee





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Poor Goose





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Writers, take note





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Too soon?




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