HAPPY VETERANS DAY, LITTLE DUCKS!

ACTUAL MILITARY WARNINGS:

"Aim towards the Enemy." 
- Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend. 
- U.S. Marine Corps

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."  
- U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you." 
- Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." 
- Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." 
- U.S. Air Force Manual

"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo." 
- Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways."  
- U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."  
- Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."  
- David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush." 
- Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."  
- Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper... once."  
- Anon

"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."  
- Unknown Marine Recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."  
- Your Buddies

"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him." 
- U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop