SHOC

SHOC
Discerning content for Bad Hombres and Nasty Women

Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Jokes, Puns, and One Liners

Graffiti on a bridge:

Some People: “That’s art!”
Other People: “That’s vandalism!”
Me: “How the hell did they get up there?”

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My great-great-great grandfather was a pirate and, according to his diary, my great-great grandfather followed in his footstep.

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Instead of milk with my cereal, I use wine. And then, also, instead of my cereal, I use wine.

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Trying to argue with someone via text is like being Italian and having to talk while handcuffed.

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Personally, I feel like Romeo and Juliet could’ve handled the situation better.

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Life Hack for Students: Decorate your room to look like your math class. You’ll fall asleep faster.

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Judging by the honks, flipped birds and jeers of “Lardass!” from the other drivers, it’s become pretty apparent that not *everyone* thinks it’s a marvelous night for a moondance.

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When I was growing up, we had seven dogs. That might not sound like a lot, but it’s 49 in dog dogs.

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I’m still unclear as to the right response for when a lady friend shows me her new hairdo, but so far I’ve ruled out “What on earth happened?” and “Is is windy out?”

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Y’know, after a long day, sometimes I like to just look into a mirror.

And reflect.


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