SHOC

SHOC
Discerning content for Bad Hombres and Nasty Women

Tuesday, June 25, 2019

Signs of the Past

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, our family used to take cross-country car trips. Dad and Mom would switch off driving, and my two sisters and I had to figure out ways to entertain ourselves.

Some of the roadside advertising was fairly interesting, but one that always caught our attention were the progressive ads for Burma-Shave. Four red signs with white letters, eventually forming a pun/poem, followed by the stylized logo:




Some Examples:


DON'T STICK YOUR ELBOW
OUT SO FAR
IT MAY GO HOME
IN ANOTHER CAR


BURMA SHAVE  


TRAINS DON'T WANDER
ALL OVER THE MAP
'CAUSE NOBODY SITS
IN THE ENGINEER'S LAP


BURMA SHAVE  


SHE KISSED THE HAIRBRUSH
BY MISTAKE
SHE THOUGHT IT WAS
HER HUSBAND JAKE


BURMA SHAVE  


DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
TO GAIN A MINUTE
YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT


BURMA SHAVE  


DROVE TOO LONG
DRIVER SNOOZING
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
IS NOT AMUSING


BURMA SHAVE  


BROTHER SPEEDER
LET'S REHEARSE
ALL TOGETHER
GOOD MORNING, NURSE


BURMA SHAVE  


CAUTIOUS RIDER
TO HER RECKLESS DEAR
LET'S HAVE LESS BULL
AND A LITTLE MORE STEER


BURMA SHAVE  


SPEED WAS HIGH
WEATHER WAS NOT
TIRES WERE THIN
X MARKS THE SPOT


BURMA SHAVE  


THE MIDNIGHT RIDE
OF PAUL FOR BEER
LED TO A WARMER
HEMISPHERE


BURMA SHAVE  


AROUND THE CURVE
LICKETY-SPLIT
BEAUTIFUL CAR
WASN'T IT?


BURMA SHAVE  


NO MATTER THE PRICE
NO MATTER HOW NEW
THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE
IN THE CAR IS YOU


BURMA SHAVE  


A GUY WHO DRIVES
A CAR WIDE OPEN
IS NOT THINKIN'
HE'S JUST HOPIN'


BURMA SHAVE  


AT INTERSECTIONS
LOOK EACH WAY
A HARP SOUNDS NICE
BUT IT'S HARD TO PLAY


BURMA SHAVE  


BOTH HANDS ON THE WHEEL
EYES ON THE ROAD
THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
DRIVER'S CODE


BURMA SHAVE  


THE ONE WHO DRIVES
WHEN HE'S BEEN DRINKING
DEPENDS ON YOU
TO DO HIS THINKING


BURMA SHAVE  


CAR IN DITCH
DRIVER IN TREE
THE MOON WAS FULL
AND SO WAS HE



PASSING SCHOOL ZONE
TAKE IT SLOW
LET OUR LITTLE
SHAVERS GROW
BURMA SHAVE  

BURMA SHAVE  


(Thanks, Melody!)

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